Is it just me or does it seem like people are finally taking the environment seriously? Years back when it was first brought to our attention, there seemed to be some brief concern about ol’ Ma nature – she was no longer the healthy grandmother we once pictured, but a tatted up biker grams who smoked crack and pooped into fresh-water supply – and all the worry subsided fairly quickly.
Lately, however, there seems to be a much larger focus on the environment only this time it seems like it actually may stick. Sure, we won’t get the poor people onboard yet, and various ultra-con doubters will still toss their arguments into the mix, but as gas prices continue to climb up to just shy of a Lincoln for a gallon, and polar bears lose their frosty habits and become just plain ol’ bears, people are quickly sidling up to new products and latching themselves onto things that have to do with the color green.
Bloomberg is making sure the taxis are all green by 2012, Steve Jobs is touting that his Apple hasn’t fallen far from the trees, and even my role-model Jay-May is coming up with ways to
pave the way plant the seed for viridescence in our daily lives (you’ll have to scroll down a bit for the article I’m talkin’ ’bout…Willis).
I was pretty skeptical of everything the first go around and I didn’t really pay attention to my own wasteful habits. Also it was hard to imagine that I could possibly be doing ANYTHING wrong.
Still, I rode my bike pretty much all the time and now I don’t even own a car. Since everyone seems to be at least doing something I was thinking about going a little greener and figured it wouldn’t be too much of a struggle to bring my own grocery bags with me to Trader Joe’s. That’s my green resolution. Here’s a list of other things I considered and why I rejected them:
1) Wear “Incredible Hulk” shirt around – rejected due to lack of preposterously huge muscles…and lack of Incredible Hulk shirt.
2) Sing “It’s not easy bein’ green” once a day – rejected due to the fact that it actually is pretty easy to be green, it’s just inconvenient. Considered changing lyrics to “It’s only slightly inconvenient bein’ green.” Didn’t flow.
3) Self-powered Electronics – Difficult and messy to bottle one’s own methane.
4) Considered suiting up a Kangaroo with avionics and flight apparatus to substitute air travel – rejected due to phobia of Kangaroos.
5) Cancel Franklin Talk – rejected due to increase depression of Franklin which would lead to binge-eating and thusly more pooping outside, potentially harming the environment more than saving the electricity it takes to record Franklin Talk.